Grocery Sales in Stores in Austin

Compares sales prices for 16 items i like to eat across six local grocery stores. Prices are in dollars, though units vary from item to item, i.e. dollars per egg, dollars per each bag of frozen potatoes, or dollars per fluid ounce of milk. I chose to go with a two dimensional clustered column graph because i am awesome.

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Zombie Cafe Optimization

In this game, one has a stupid zombie staff that one gets to serve disgusting meals to idiotic customers. Naturally, it was my favorite. Once a zombie chef finishes preparing a meal, they place the serving dish on a counter. From there, zombie waiters can obtain one serving of a meal to deliver to a seated customer. Since the amount of time it takes for a single customer to be served has a trickle down effect on the entire restaurant (quickly serving customers yields higher tips, rapid turnover increases profit and prevents customers from leaving angrily due to inadequate seating, extended service times increase the overall number of waiters needed to serve a steady flow of customers, etc.), obviously it is crucial to optimize this factor of game play. One element of the serving process that greatly affects service time is the location of the serving dish, since this modulates the amount of time for a stupid zombie waiter to obtain a disgusting dish, bring it t...

What Happens When I Can't Get to Excel?

In life, sometimes it's hard to get to your spreadsheets. Maybe you're playing a computer game that takes up your entire screen, and you can't reach your netbook that's on your home network and accesses all those spreadsheets you've stored on your shared external hard drive. Or maybe you're researching RAM cards so said computer game will run faster, but you're using the POS computer you hacked into at your bartending job. Anyway, in such instances, you have to use nature's spreadsheet: paper. Here're some sweet examples of my less digital spreadsheets. Best for you?

Find Yourself a Husband! (don't talk about the constitution)

Makeup--technically none of us need it, but so many of us use it. Research shows that we primarily use it because we're anxious and insecure and want to appear less noticeable, or because we want to be more attractive, and have been taught that our natural, untouched faces are un attractive. Cool! Not only is makeup crazy expensive, but it expires relatively quickly. What's that you say? "Expiration dates on my eye shadow?! I ignore the expiration dates on medication, so there's no way I'm taking an expiration date from a company called e.l.f. seriously!" Sure, you seem credible. Well what if i told you expired makeup can cause breakouts; skin parasites; infections; loss of vision; puffy, red, and/or swollen eyes; styes; conjunctivitis; pink eye; and more? Still want to put that shit on your face? Didn't think so! But how to track this? Let's start with the PAO (or "Period After Opening") symbol that's on most co...

Excel Excess

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