Skip to main content

Zombie Cafe Optimization

In this game, one has a stupid zombie staff that one gets to serve disgusting meals to idiotic customers.  Naturally, it was my favorite.



Once a zombie chef finishes preparing a meal, they place the serving dish on a counter.  From there, zombie waiters can obtain one serving of a meal to deliver to a seated customer.  Since the amount of time it takes for a single customer to be served has a trickle down effect on the entire restaurant (quickly serving customers yields higher tips, rapid turnover increases profit and prevents customers from leaving angrily due to inadequate seating, extended service times increase the overall number of waiters needed to serve a steady flow of customers, etc.), obviously it is crucial to optimize this factor of game play.

One element of the serving process that greatly affects service time is the location of the serving dish, since this modulates the amount of time for a stupid zombie waiter to obtain a disgusting dish, bring it to an idiot customer, return to obtain the next dish, etc.  So, to determine what serving dish locations were optimal, i ran several trials where i placed meals at different locations, then counted how many dishes were served from each location for each configuration.  Locations were determined by numbering each tile on the grid, starting with the leftmost, then counting up and to the right.

The best locations to place Gnasty Gnocchi, Wonton Goop, Misfortune Cookies, etc. are, in order, 5, 4, 2, 38, 3.

Conclusion:  i have taken a waste of time (Zombie Cafe) and found a way to waste more time thinking about the game than actually playing it.

Revelation:  by blogging about this, i am wasting even more time.  I am so meta right now!

Warning:  this is not the last Zombie Cafe Optimization post.
Labels:
Location: Austin, TX 78741, USA

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

What Happens When I Can't Get to Excel?

In life, sometimes it's hard to get to your spreadsheets.  Maybe you're playing a computer game that takes up your entire screen, and you can't reach your netbook that's on your home network and accesses all those spreadsheets you've stored on your shared external hard drive. Or maybe you're researching RAM cards so said computer game will run faster, but you're using the POS computer you hacked into at your bartending job.  Anyway, in such instances, you have to use nature's spreadsheet:  paper.  Here're some sweet examples of my less digital spreadsheets.    Best for you?
Post a Comment
Read more

Grocery Store Sale Comparisons

I'm collecting more data and refining these graphs!  Featured above are the items generally priced above one dollar per unit. This graph showcases those items which typically cost less than one dollar per unit. Above and below are data tables, featuring item descriptions and sale expiration dates. The above tables streamline the data for the graphs.  The databases below are used in formulas within the cells of the above tables to reference the appropriate values from the more detailed tables farther above and populate the appropriate cells.
Post a Comment
Read more